She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
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