Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Randomize
