Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Randomize
