If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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