Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
