i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize
