I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Randomize
