Non-Jews are for practice
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
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