We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
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