love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
Randomize
