im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
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