"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
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