I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
They took my balls.
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
She made me pour olive oil on her.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
Randomize
