I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
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