Ambien. No doubt about it.
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
Randomize