I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
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