I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
We're hate flirting, damnit.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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