I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
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