I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
Randomize
