I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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