The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
