yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
Pants are for mortals
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize
