He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize
