ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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