hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I just forgot I was standing up.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Randomize
