I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
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