you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
