Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
