I only kidnapped one of them. chill
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Randomize
