YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
He literally asked permission to hit on me
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
