Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
