I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
I want a musical about memes.
Randomize
