I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
Randomize