whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
Randomize
