i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
