So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
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