have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
Randomize
