I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
Randomize
