what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Go christen that room with your naked body.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
Randomize
