im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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