We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
