Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
