and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
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