I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
