i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
