we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
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