i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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