I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
