Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Randomize
