I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Randomize
