Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize
